Jan/087
Day 7: My Internal Conflict
I'm not going to lie: when it was my ex's birthday last year, I listened to The Smiths "Unhappy Birthday" on repeat. Is there a song that captures that sweet essence of hating someone you also still love more? Look at the lyrics: And if you should die/I may feel slightly sad/but I won't cry and then the clincher, that lovely aside at the end: "from the one you left behind".
In my case, it was more: I hope you're happy with that skinny bitch! I bet her ass isn't taking you to Europe and dinner at Absinthe and buying youtickets to a fucking Red Sox game two rows behind home plate, you fucking asshole! By the way, I love you. And I miss you. BABY COME BACK (you can blame it all on me).
Ahem.
Which brings us to this video. I was looking for videos of UnHappy Birthday on YouTube and stumbled upon the following trainwreck of an iMovie montage that one very upset man made for his ex on his birthday and then apparently SENT TO HIM, which to me, is the saddest part of all, how clearly he still cares for him. You don't send links to people you are not still in love with.
Edit: The YouTube embed link was messing up, so we're going to have to do it the hard way and you're going to have to click through! Wishing An UnHappy Birthday to Joey Nelson
There's also a blog, and apparently this dude owes his ex 11,500 dollars, in which case, the above video doesn't seem so psychotic. Naturally, I'm very curious to find out the details. I ran the asshole's name through all the usual social networking sites and came up with nothing. The scorned ex has a personal blog and even a Yelp account, but unlike yours truly, they don't vomit out all of their business on the Internet and there is no dirt to be found. Perhaps the creator of the video, Todd, will find this blog entry and give me the gossip. Send me an e-mail at maria AT onesharpbroad.com, I'll buy you a drink in exchange for details!
January 27th, 2008
Oy. There’s a big difference between, you know, mourning your ex and hoping that the next time they see you ironic 80s music is playing and you’re looking hot on a motorcycle behind Daniel Craig and…starting a blog maligning them and creating a sad video montage.
There is always the possibility that the ex is of the “if I can’t have him, no-one will!” variety and the part about the $115,000 is not true. In which case, my pity would considerably wane.
January 27th, 2008
I am consistently amazed by your ability to be everywhere at once on the interweb. Also, I’ll take you to Absinthe! Actually fuck Absinthe; we should really go to Essencia if you still haven’t been.
January 27th, 2008
@tanya – girl, if i can find out any gossip, i will pass on!
@megan, i am just a loser with excellent search skills. and i think that video may be the second or third hit when you search “unhappy birthday” on youtube. i haven’t been to essencia – let’s go!
January 28th, 2008
I can’t get the video OR blog to work! blasphemy!
January 28th, 2008
@melisser – the embed code isn’t working! i am not sure why, it worked when i posted it. check out the link now!
also, the blog should also be okay. IF ANYONE ELSE READS THIS AND FINDS A BROKEN LINK, LET ME KNOW!
January 29th, 2008
MD! I’m missing your latest posts…are you going to do double posts today to make up for it?! You have me on a schedule now. I have wants and needs. If I don’t get it, I’ll die.
(and that’s how you end up pregnant, ladies!)
April 9th, 2008
Maria,
Well, I found your blog. I’m not sure about rehashing the whole sordid story, but suffice it to say that his last birthday rolled around and I just got pissed. He owes me money that he promised to pay back, and I haven’t heard a word from him.
As far as the personal life goes, though, I’ve moved on. So your readers like Tanya can rest easy. And, thankfully he doesn’t owe me $115,000 (I think that was typo, Tanya). It was “just” $11,500. Add an extra zero and I would be banging down his door.
The blog is a little sad, I’ll admit. But, to be honest, since he won’t respond to any inquiries about repayment of his debt, I was sort of hoping he or his family would stumble across it. Just to add a little embarrassing pressure. You see, as far as I know, he’s still in the closet to his family. Nice for a man in his mid-30s, huh?
Now, about that drink . . .
P.S. Making an iMovie is really easy when you have all the photos in iPhoto. It took all of 5 minutes. Gotta love Apple. And, I never actually sent the link to him. I do, however, hope he has seen it by now.