Feb/088
The tyranny of the "drinks" date
I'd like you to meet my new coach in life & love, Patti Stanger. I am unsure about what is happening to me, but I think my year of single dom is starting to wear on me because while watching my new trash tv addiction, The Millionaire Matchmaker, I find myself agreeing with a lot of what this insane bitch says. And After a date that ended pretty terribly a few days ago (no details please, suffice to say I will not be receiving emails from this gentleman any longer), I feel I need to institute a new rule for my dating life inspired by Patti. And that is: No more "drinks" dates. I don't know if this is a an online dating thing or a modern dude OMG I'M SO BUSY thing but I am sick of dates that are just drinks. And I refuse to go on them any longer.
Patti breaks it down like this: "coffee is cheap and drinks are an audition". My thoughts exactly. Besides, coffee dates are for meeting for a job interview or when you meet up with your friends who work downtown. And I understand that the point of a "drinks" date is just in case you have no chemistry, you can make an easy exit, but I think I am also done with impatient dudes who want to meet after exchanging two emails. But, as Patti also says, "It?s important to remember that even if your date is not your dream guy, you are gathering information and experience, called Dating Data, that you will use on future dates with someone more to your liking." (Text taken from Patti's rules!)
This is another thing that has happened in online dating: whereas previously I felt that guys were more willing to actually I don't know, learn a few things about you, now after a few emails in which you both agree that yes, you do enjoy Flight of the Chonchords and no, you don't have a corporate job, and they stalk you on Myspace to make sure you are not repulsive, dudes want to immediately jump to meeting. Like that night.
So from now on: dinner dates. Like in Patti's club, at 4 or 5 star restaurants only. So getting a burrito does not count. I believe this eliminates any person who would actually date me but it may be time for an overhaul of my "standards". If anyone knows any investment bankers who enjoy dates with dirty mouthed chubby ladies who would like to take me to any of the restaurants listed here, let me know.
February 14th, 2008
I am so glad you love that show, because I am likewise addicted. While some of her comments are wack, like “redheads are stale produce” (hi Laura!) or when she was telling that girl with gorgeous tight curls that framed her face and made her look stunning that she should straighten her hair because “men want straight hair”.
BUT, she does also make a lot of valid and insightful points, and she takes the men to task more than the women for sure. I love how she’ll also put a guy on a date with a specific kind of girl to teach him a lesson. My favorite part of the last episode was when the douche-y zen guy went on a date with a model half his age after being all self-righteous about how he wanted to date a non-model his age, and he started yapping to her about how he fed all these starving people in Costa Rica or something, and she was like, “yeah, cool…I’m totally trying to cut down on my carbs right now.” Hilarity!
February 14th, 2008
Tanya! I loved that episode b/c she totally called it: he was all blah blah blah about meeting a successful, smart woman over 30 and of course he didn’t pick the older social worker, he picked the DUMB ASS model. I loved how she wouldn’t even eat salad at the restaurant (after saying she was trying to cut down on carbs).
February 14th, 2008
Yeah, he’s one of those creepy older guys who tries to justify dating younger women by saying he’s a “teacher” or some shit (when in reality he’s just a windbag who wants to date a hot piece half his age). She was totally dumb but smart enough to not call him. I guess she learned him good!
February 14th, 2008
i love this show and watch it on my 6ft television. thank god for late night reruns. but please Patty, give the half leggings a rest. Thank you.
February 14th, 2008
nancy – hahaha! i know! she’s like lindsay with the leggings. she just can’t get enough of them! can’t patty afford some pants???
February 15th, 2008
I agree, Patty tells it like it motherfucking IS! All of us should have a seasons finale viewing party and dress as our favorite character from the season! We can watch on Nancy’s 50 foot tv!
Also, I know, Tanya, STALE PRODUCE!!! bullshit! but i think patti’s right! she usually is! maybe i should go blonde or brunette? or become a lesbian?
February 15th, 2008
Okay, I am seriously onboard with this viewing party idea. I will make vegan cupcakes, Laura, so MAKE IT HAPPEN! We can also watch at my place, because lord knows D has a secret love of Bravo Reality shows that dares not speak its name as well.
February 23rd, 2008
i might be into this season finale viewing. and yes, you can all come over the house and watch it on the ridiculous tv. just pay no mind the state of our house in its half-storage state. i dont know when finale is but right abt now i feel like death has warmed over. so hopefully no time soon.